Body Language and Techniques in Flirting

Body Language is the non-verbal communication that we do in virtually every aspect of our lives. It is a mirror that tells us what other people think and feel about us. Only between 7-10% of what we say is actually used to convey a message. Would you believe that between 60-80% of our meaning is put across in Body Language. Body language and the understanding of it can help us literally read other people’s minds and also ensure that we can convey the message we want to put across to that prospective partner – both consciously but most significantly: sub-consciously.

Courtship body language has been investigated thoroughly and the basic signals are almost completely unconscious. The more you understand those signals the more successful you will be when courting the object of your desire.
When you are giving the signals, these are some you may want to remember:

- The first and main point to remember is that you must feel good about yourself but be genuine and yourself or you may come across a deceitful or even desperate.

- Don’t worry about the impression you are making and concentrate on making that person feel good.

- Make yourself approachable by putting a smile on your face. Smiling demonstrates confidence, friendliness and a good mood. Having a sense of humour is also a great asset and puts across that you are fun to be with.

- Maintain eye contact, your eyes probably are the most expressive parts of your body, when you maintain eye contact you are expressing your sincerest intensions and a bond is established.

- Remember to move a little, standing or sitting a bit still is a put off. Be open physically and do not cross your arms or hold an obstructive item ( such as food) between you.

- Be aware of personal space – do not invade personal space unless invited.

- Be persistent. Flirting works best when you are patient. By being such, you will have room for improvement if at first you aren’t getting the results you want. If you fail the first time, do it again and just keep trying.

An exact science this is not but it is all about interaction and persistence. Read the signals and react. Have any of your efforts worked? See below for some of the signals that are given out

- If they look down and away, they’re interested. – If they looks to the left or right, they’re not interested.

Men and women can digress with some of their signals. For Women the following signals are a good indication.

- Look at the lips – It’s probably working. She wears that big smile with teeth exposed and with a relaxed face. She bites her lips or she licks her lips and touches the front of her teeth.

- Check out the Eyes – Eye brows may be raised seductively , a deep stare with dilated pupils may also be apparent.

- Hair Play – She may be stroking her hair or playing with her hair, or perhaps the slow motion commercial moment of the hair being thrown over the shoulders.

- How is she sitting? – You can tell it from the way she sits. She sits with an open leg or crosses her legs in a manner where her thighs can be seen. Or her legs are rubbing against each other or against the leg of the table.

- Hand Action – Is she rubbing her wrists in a suggestive manner, Is she rubbing her chin or cheek.

For Men – Simplicity is the answer

- Is there eye contact? – Are they smiling? – Are they Confident?

Body language is like any other language, you can get away with knowing a little to get yourself understood and get most of what you want. To learn fluently you need to spend more time and effort studying.

Good luck it is great fun!!

Paul Latter


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